i mean, the DMPA shot...my bad. love, jen

AHHHHHHH. i just watched LOVE ACTUALLY and i seriously can't wait till monday. i miss you guys all so much. woohoo!!!!! i love the holidays with friends. we have A LOT to catch up on, can't wait!!!!

Ditto!!! If things get crazy at your house, Jen, I may just slumber:) I'm so excited, you guys, lately I've really been feeling like a reunion is in high demand. I had an idea just now. Since we have so much love to give what if we could use it or sell it to better the economy. People would always buy love:) And now we could figure out a way to put a price on love, haha. But not in a creepy way. You know, befriend loners or lonely people. Nothing slutty or inappropriate, haha. I think after all my smoking in the past few years, I'm starting to think sober sometimes the way I think when I'm high. Weeeeird. See you Monday!

i was gonna post again but decided against it. just gonna wait until i see your beautiful faces monday night! aaaaahhhhhh....i cannot wait! love you and see you very very soon!

Christiane,
I'm so sorry that things are so hard with the parentals. I can only imagine how sucky it is. Can you increase your work hours or get another part time job? Maybe not wanting to be around them is a push that could lead to you making even more money and moving out. Maybe you can figure some more stuff out about the teaching that you were into before? Did you still want to do that? Sorry about all the suggestions/questions. I don't want you to feel lectured, I'm just trying to give you options. Totally cool if you just want to talk about it with us though. If that's the case, then keep it coming. I love you and care about you so much.

Marisa,
It sounds like things with John are going great! That is amazing. The first kiss, being taken out, him understanding roommie love... it all sounds so fun. I'm very happy for you. Let me know how things go this Friday. Enjoy yourself! ;)

Tera,
Major loves, always.


Ok, so there have been some major developments with Janden. The same night I was going to talk to him about the whole "intimate" thing a couple of weeks ago, we ended up hooking up. It was really good. We talked about the intimate convo, and apparently it was a misunderstanding. We've hooked up a few times since then. I'm enjoying things so much. Definitely more than I ever have before. I think it's because I've gotten to know him and care about him. I really like that I am open and honest with him. He says and seems to operate like that too. Also, he asked me to bring my vibrator into the bedroom. (I have a hard time orgasming without it.) I was really excited that he was all about it. I actually think I want to have sex with him soon. It is a major turn on that likes talking about everything. I feel safe and comfortable knowing that he is really honest. We hang out a few days a week. Things are going well. The only tough part of this is I'm not sure if I really like him or if I like the idea of him. Like I might be more excited about just having someone. Even thought I never wanted to do that, I've decided that I'm just gonna go with it because I'm happy. I've been wanting more experiences and that's what I'm getting. I like spending time with him and I'm really physically attracted to him. I'm gonna keep seeing him, but I'd like to know what you ladies think. I'll keep you filled in. Love you all. See you very soon for Thanksgiving break!!!! Loves.


JEN

Okay, I just talked to John and the second date is: miniature golfing or mini go cart racing, hahahahahahahaha, followed by going out in Hermosa for his roommate's birthday. Christiane, Daniel Calvo's birthday. I just wanted to let you guys know. I feel that you'll appreciate those activities for our date. I'm very excited:)

Hello ladies.

It's been a while since I've been on here. I have talked to both of you since your recent blogs, so I do feel up to date:) Nothing crazy has been going on over here, really. A lot of work which is great, but also I feel like I need to make more money still. Oh well. This guy at work may pay me to do his Spanish homework, haha, literally. School's good; I think I only have 1 month left. This semester went by super fast. I have a lot of things left to do, like papers, so I think I'm going to try and be productive during Thanksgiving break. Jen, what day do you come home?

Ohh, news update: Ryan #1 is moving to Seattle for work. I can't believe it, it is so crazy. It really feels like the end of an era. It has been such a weird week in terms of revelations about him and then the new John (Quinn's friend) being around. I am so in shock though. He leaves Wednesday I guess, and obviously I'm not calling him to say goodbye or anything, and I doubt he'll call me. Even though it's all been over for awhile now, with him being physically away, it is like really over. A very strange feeling. I figure that the one time I saw him at Paramount when he had changed his shirt was the first and only time I saw him since everything came crashing down. Everything really does happen for a reason I guess. Seeing him, him calling me, etc. I wonder if I'll ever see him again. What if it's like in a movie, and I see him in 10 years and we find each other on the street but we're both married and have kids??? Weird!!! I'm not sure I could even then face his girlfriend. I know this sounds weird, and I was telling Christiane about it the other day, but sometimes I stop and think that something really bad is going to happen to me sometime soon. I feel like I have yet to experience my incredibly bad karma for the whole year with Ryan and that traumatizing and horrendous night. We came to the conclusion that I got my karma early with the HPV, but I don't completely buy that possibility. I feel like things have been relatively going well for me and that kind of scares me. Something bad is soon to happen. Also, sometimes I pray for Ryan's gf that good things happen to her b/c of the bad that she doesn't even know happened to her. I feel pretty positive he never told her, but who knows, maybe he did. I hope nothing bad happens to her.

Anyways, I went on a date with John last night and it was really good! I'm pretty excited about it so we'll see what happens. He picked me up at Corin's and we went to eat sushi. Conversation was good, butterflies were going, and food was good too:) After that we just went back to Corin's and hung out for a few hours. It was a really good night. Ohh, and he kissed me when I walked him out. Yeah!!! I'm so glad I held out when we were drunk, because the sober kiss was that much better. I think he likes me so far and I like him so far. He's very intelligent, cute, and nerdy. And very gentlemanly, probably b/c he was raised in Kentucky, midwest boy. But he's a liberal, thank god for me! More details to come when we talk on the phone or after this Friday when we're going out next.

That's all that's new with me. Jen, I need to call you so I can get the update on Janden. Burk, I'll call you later this week as well, but I'm glad we talked today. I really wanted to make sure you were still breathing. Tera, hope you're staying warm over there:)

Love you all, Boo

P.S. I talked about you 3 last night to John and how it's so sad to me we're not all together. He totally understood and said "Wow, I don't know what I would do if all my close friends were spread out over the country." It was a very defining moment in my feelings for him. He gets it.

take this time to yell at christiane for anything we are angry about; be it work, relationship, or personal affairs. apparently she is just here so that you can unload everything you are frustrated about onto her. you're right, she's a lazy fuck who has her head in the clouds and doesn't care about anything. thank you for reminding me of that. is there anything else you would like to lecture me about? perhaps we should have another conversation about my future career and how everyone is so disappointed in me. maybe that will really get me to secretly realize that i was wrong and silly and that you were right all along. wow mom and dad, you're right, i truly deeply DO wanna be a doctor this whole time! thanks for always shoving it down my throat. you're the best. in fact, since that all worked out so well lets shove some other unrealistic, annoying, and self deprecating expectations down my throat as well. maybe a little "lets bash on christiane's weight until she feels ugly and fat enough to actually loose weight like we want her to". that one always worked wonders. yes, please order me one of those. gulp. tastes yummy.

thanks.

Hellllo. Just writing to check in real quick. Things are good, a lot of reading I am so behind on. Will write more later after my school week is over.

Jen, talked to you yesterday:)

Burk, call you soon. Have fun skinny dipping. And for the record, I don't believe Tim for one minute about being over you, especially since he wants to spend a holiday for you. He's a f**** liar, haha. But really

Tera, I play phone tag with myself and your phone. And I'm thinking we can't will all battles (referring to Obama and Prop 8).

Love you!!! Can't wait for Thanksgiving break!

hmmm, that's a tough one. i don't understand why he would be into it one minute and then not the next. maybe he feels put on the spot? crazy. jen, i love you.

sooooo met this guy at work named tyler. on a whim i invited him to bj's party. he didn't go but we texted all day monday. then he calls me and we talk for like half an hour. oh p.s. apparently i'm not really a phone talker these days. i mean, i felt like half an hour was mooooore than enough time but when i tried to get off he kept saying things like, "oh i was really hoping to talk to you some more" hmmmm. not so much. but we made plans to hang on friday after work. EXCEPT the plans are: skinny dipping. Whhaaaaat? it's like negative zero degrees outside much less, in the WATER! but it seems fun and adventures so i'm in. he goes to church every sunday and on wednesday for like a youth group thing. so i figured it would be ok. right? i don't know., he drinks so that's good. he's on the skinnier side so i'm a little worried of being an ogress around him but we'll see how things go. he's completely serious about the skinny dipping. he called me today to remind me to bring something "easy to take off" and a warm change of clothes. haha. hmmm. tell me what you guys think.

also, tim officially no longer has a crush on me. which is good i guess. we're hanging out tomorrow which i'm excited about. ALSOOOOO crazy thing. so my family is going to las vegas for thanksgiving and jenna's bday. i probably wont be able to go because i'll have to work and i absolutely CAN NOT call in. which sucks but the crazy part is that tim isn't going home so he was planning on just watching the football game for thanksgiving....do you see where this is going? tim and i are spending thanksgiving together! haha! we're gonna make mashed potatoes and a turkey. i feel better about having someone over rather than just spend it getting high(probably) by myself. so kinda fun, weird, thing. anyways, that's that.

tera, i love you. call me. don't stress.

marisa, i love you, call me, don't stress. haha. actually i'll probably call you later. i know you said you had a paper to write.

jen, i love you and talked to you yesterday. good luck with janden. i really don't know what to say. that's weird.

love you all. christiane jacquel.ine pepitone

oh ok, i understand now. thanks for filling me in. sorry if you didn't want to recount all that in writing, but i appreciate being caught up. so where did you meet the russian jew? i'm really glad that is how you identified him on the blog. good stuff. i feel like that might be a funny story that you should share. also, i'm glad that it worked out well as a grecian. i bet you looked cute.

the guy with the dog is good. i like him so far and enjoy spending time with him. the last time we hung out: i met him at his place. he drove us to the train station, where we took the train into the city. we had dinner and started having drinks. we got carried away, stayed for too long, drank too much, and missed the train back. we had to take a taxi back to his place. i wasn't too drunk but there was no way i was driving home. i spent the night there and we cuddled and made out. he seems to be cool with taking things slow and not having sex right away. he said it's refreshing that i don't want to rush into it. i thought that was interesting. i'm not totally sure but my gut tells me that i'm into it a bit more than he is. we're going to a 'knotts scary farm' thing at a local theme park for halloween this friday. i'll keep you filled in.

ok.... well this is the story:
a long time ago when i was really into tim, rc and i went out to dinner. we were chatting about life and i asked him about his love life and he told me about natalie. he said she was a girl he was really good friends with and it's either like he has to marry her or never see her again. so he told me all about how great and perfect she was. so i knew this all along but for some reason i didn't believe it i suppose. or i don't know but it wasn't that big of a deal to me at the time. maybe because i had tim? annnnyways, then recently i'm talking to jagmin (mike jagmin from rc's top gun party)and we're talking about halloween and chicago. rc comes up and then who's going and natalie. then mike says rc probably wont stay with him because he'll be with natalie. i play dumb and he tells me that natalie is in love with rc and rc is in love with natalie. KABOOM-BA. i realize that they'll hook up and spend the weekend together and it finally hits me. FINALLY. plus he's been talking about moving out there. so i just finally pieced all the pieces together. that's that.

also, i don't really feel like he strung me along. i pretty much strung myself along. he never said he liked me (except that one time) and we haven't hooked up in a while. i just had crazy hopes.

but thank you. it's ok. i hooked up with a russian jew the other night and that made me feel better. how's the guy with the dog? still into him? things working out? also, i ended up just throwing a sheet around me and was grecian. for some reason it turned out A LOT better than the last time i did it. i think i was trying to hard.

LVOES

christiane...how/when did you find this out? i am so pissed that he never said anything to you! laaaaame. even if you guys are only friends, it's not fair that you were strung along. i hate that shit. i'm sorry that he is unavailable. blah. maybe this could help move along the getting over him process if you want to look at it like that. please know that you are wonderful. any man would be lucky to have you. if i was a guy i would be allll over it ;) i mean, you are such a lover. so smart, interesting, affectionate. i could go on for days, as i'm sure you already know. i hope that it gets easier and less sucky as time goes. loves.

natalie is in love with rc and rc is in love with natalie. he'd marry her, and the only reason they're not married now is distance. she lives in st. louis and he's here. but that doesn't really matter anyway since he'll probably move out there for work. so really, it's a great, big, lovely little love story they have together. he's going out there for halloween. they'll hook up and be in love there. fantastic. he'll come home and miss her and think about her and get giddy over her phone calls while i'm in the passenger seat looking out the window waiting for it to all be over. kill me now.

Hello Hello,

So I don't have a phone, but for real this time. I lost it and had to have it disconnected so that's why you might get a weird message if you call it. I'm not sure when I'll get a new once since it's about two hundred for the cheapest phone at the verizon store. I'm hoping I can find a used one and just use that but who knows if and when that'll happen. I might just have to buy one of ebay and get it shipped but that means i'll be without a phone for about a week. We'll see, I'll keep you all updated.

Jen, Who is this new man? We have lots to talk about. I tried calling you today (it's from a restricted number) but I guess you were in school maybe? Ok, so I checked out Janden's myspace. He seems to really love his dog... I mean, tell me more about how you feel about this? And you said you were going to meet him when you guys went hiking. How did that go? How bad is the dog situation and are you willing to put up with this dog? P.S. I was at target today and in the dog section there were leashes for large dogs, medium dogs, and toy dogs. No joke, they call those super small dogs toy dogs. I thought it was beyond appropriate. Anyway, I also saw that he likes Dance Dance Revolution. Jen, that is so perfect for you. You guys should play together. Haha. You'll kick his ass.

Burk, I'm sorry about Saturday. I want to hear all about it. Crazy stories? I'm sure. How is studying for midterms and stuff going? Good, busy? Want to get lunch or dinner during the week or is your schedule packed? Let me know.

Tera, loves.

Christiane,
I agree with Marisa that you should make out with whoever you want to. I don't know if I'm getting confused, but who's Matt Everett? I don't think it's so bad if you make out when you're bored. A girl's gotta pass the time somehow. What do you think bothers you about it? Are you holding out for RC or do you not want to lead Matt Everett on if you're not that into him? I want to know how you're feeling about it. Fill me in. Also, I messed in my last message to you. I meant to type that senorita sounds like it would be more fun to be but either would be way cute ;)

Marisa,
Yikes. It sounds like there's tons of school stuff going on with you. How did your presentation and mock therapy session go? I feel like that mock therapy session would be tough to do in front of everyone! I'm sure you did great. How about the second interview for your practicum? Any word about a place for sure? Congrats on paying off the Express and Bloomingdale's credit cards! That's exciting. Thanks for the schedule. It feels like the old days when we all used to know where/what we were doing at all times, haha.

Tera, loves.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things are good on my end. I'm happy and enjoying my life. School is going well. Nothing too crazy. My second date with Janden was pretty fun. We went to a really nice Mediterranean place for dinner. We're going hiking this Sunday, which I'm excited about. He's bringing his dog, haha. He seems to really loves that thing and I kind of want to meet the little guy. I did warn him that I'm not a pet person so we'll see. I'm still into him, Janden, not the dog ;) I'll let you know how things go. So I'm a stalker and I myspaced him, even though I don't have myspace. You can look him up if you want. His name is Janden Sullivan. He has a lot of older photos up. Now he has scuff on his face and his hair is a good length, not too long and not short. One thing about him that I'm not sure about is he is very calm and speaks slowly. I can't figure out if I hate it or love it. You know me...spastic, eccentric, animated, all of the above. Hope all is still well with everyone. Sorry it took me so long to post this time. Love love love you all.

JEN

Hello previous matrons of 87th place,

It's been awhile since I've blogged, sorry about that. Jen, it sounds like you had a great time in New Orleans from what you said on the phone and blog. I hope I can go one day; it sounds like a great city to party in:) I need to call you so I can hear about Date #2 with Janden. I hope you're still interested. It must be pretty hard getting back into the groove of school after the vaca, but good luck this week starting your new rotation. I would definitely have you as my nurse, it's actually what I"m counting on:) Call you this week.

Christiane, all your costume ideas are very fun and I'm excited to see which one you go with. I'm really happy I got to do a happy hour with you and I hope I see you this Saturday for Quinn's birthday. Your boy stories keep me young and I love them. Make out with whoever your lips desire, RC's dumb all the time, so I'm sure he won't be any more different even if he finds out about Matt Everest. It's pretty funny he actually does live in that frat house we weren't sure about, haha. I'll call you Tuesday probably after work.

Tera: phone tag. One of these we will finally communicate, but in the meantime I hope you're surviving school and enjoying yourself also.

I've been really busy with school projects. Tomorrow, I have a presentation in my addictions class on opioids. It's a group one, but an hour long, so I'm finishing preparing for it now. I also have a mock group therapy session tomorrow in my group counseling class. Cory and I mock co-lead a 4-5 person group in front of the rest of the class. Nerve wrecking! During the week, I'm pretty much with Cory all the time before, during, and after class. We study together a lot and she's great. I've started the interview process for my practicum next semester. I had one last week and it went well; I got a 2nd interview with them. I have another one tomorrow morning with another agency and then another on Friday. I really hope I get a place soon, because it's too stressful just hanging over my head. But we will see. I didn't do much this weekend except study and work. I had Friday night off so I hung out with Corin and Michael. That was fun, but that's about it. I finally paid off my Express and Bloomingdale's credit cards so I am almost homefree. Now I just have my Wamu card. So I'm trying really hard to save my money in the meantime and it's going okay.

Here's my schedule also, just to have:

Monday: Morning- appointments, interviews, studying, projects, gym
class from 4-10
Tuesday: Work from 10-5
studying at night
Wednesday: Morning- same as Monday or work from 10-5
class from 7-10
Thursday: mornings same as Monday and Wednesdays
tutoring from 4-530
class 7-10
Friday: work from 10-5 or at work at night
studying day or night
Saturday: study
work at 6
Sunday: study
work at 530

This is my general schedule just in case you don't know when to reach me:)

Talk to you soon! Love you, Bye!

Marisa

i make out with boys when i'm bored...

just got back from matt everett's house. (burk, he's totally in a frat and has a really cool house/room.) probably should have stayed home but whatever. it'll get back to rc and i'll be unhappy about it but whatever, i deserve it.

details:
we're making out on his bed and in the middle of our sesh i get up and say i have to go home. he gives me a weird look and asks why. i tell him i don't know and that i'm leaving and he can either walk me out or stay here but either way i wont take it personally. he walks me out confused and tells me this is exactly how things happened last time... "we were making out and everything was great and then you tell me you have to go." he's right.

so anything new in your guys' life?

Christiane,
I love either costume idea. I feel like being a hippy might be a bit easier but think about how fun it would to tell people what you are. Tim sounds like a big of fun, geez. Sorry you have to deal with that crazy. Anymore obsessing on his part? The bamboo structure is beautiful. You and your pops should be very proud. Also, the name tag warms my heart. Lastly, I wouldn't be opposed to seeing Sarah Palin with her hair down ;)

Tera,
I'm glad you're alive and well. It sounds like there is all kinds of busy on your end. Keep up the hard work in school. Enjoy your life with Grant. Wow, so you've got a pretty good life right now, hu? Good for you. Actually, we're not there to share it with you, so I guess it can't be thaaaat great, haha jk.

Marisa,
I am so sorry about everything you are going through with your feelings for old Ryan. I think you are very strong for wanting to talk about this stuff. There are a couple of lines that really resonated with me: the first was when you said you were distracting yourself from yourself during the summer and the other was how you want to now sit with your feelings. I have totally felt both of those things, for different reasons, but still know how hard it is to get through it. You do have an outlet. Whenever, whatever. We are always here to listen. Let me know if I can do anything for you. I understand that it helps to get it out. Do that. Just type your little heart out. I'm gonna call you tomorrow. I love you very much.


Sorry it's been so long since I've been on the blog. I just got back from New Orleans!! It was soooooo much fun. I know you girls would have loved loved it. We stayed in the French Quarter about half a block from Bourbon. So it was super close to get to the craziness but far enough to so we weren't kept up from all the noise. We went out every single night. You get cheap drinks everywhere and all the bars are open and playing live music...the kind we love and that's fun to dance to. We went on a big boat up and down the Mississippi River. We took a haunted hotel tour in the quarter. We got our palms read. We took an air boat tour on the bayou...I got to hold an alligator and bull frog and the guy let me drive the boat, haha. We went to a place called Cafe Du Monde which is open 24 hours a day and had beignets (they are like donuts with tons of powdered sugar and are bomb.) The food was amazing. We ate beautifully...jambalaya, gumbo, fried shrimp, fish, alligator...everything you can think of. I had the best time and now am back at school trying to read for class on Monday. We have 8 chapters to read before class starts. Good Lord. I'm meeting this guy Janden from yahoo tomorrow. He sounds cool but who knows? Don't hold your breath, ha. I will fill you all in asap.

Love, Jen